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New bike shorts... or how I understand women much better now

Even though I’m saving an insane amount of money because I don’t drive most of the time, I still hate spending too much money on bike stuff. Even though it’s one of the activities I do extremely consistently, it still feels like a little bit of affectation.

As such, I have one short-sleeved jersey (that Reese got for me), one long-sleeved jersey, one bike jacket, one set of legwarmers, and one pair of bike shorts. And, really, I don’t need a second pair of bike shorts most of the time, because I don’t go on a ride that’s hard enough to actually demand bike shorts but once a week.

Well, after what happened a few weeks ago, I still only have one pair of bike shorts… and I think I understand women a bit better.

When I first started to realize that I was going on a lot of bike rides, I got myself some bike shorts. I tried a few of the low-to-mid-end shorts at Sports Basement on and got a pair of the Sugoi Evolution shorts. And there’s nothing especially wrong with them. They weren’t cheap crap.

And on Saturday, I noticed they were a bit old and worn… but I didn’t think too much of it, so I just wore them and went on my ride anyway. After all, there’s a difference between worn and unwearable. But after a bit, I noticed that I was getting a decided chafe mark between my legs and that’s because I had a rapidly expanding hole there. It’s not in the area that risked displaying my genitalia to the world, but it was in the area that rubs against the saddle on occasion.

So I had to run into a clothing store and buy some new bike shorts. Now, I’ve gotten quite a few txts from my wife saying that she had to run into a clothing store and buy one thing or another. It’s added up over the years. And women always complain about getting a run in their pantyhose. So for once in my life, I understood women. Thankfully, there’s a Sports Basement in the Presidio so I was fine.

I figured that I should probably get some new Sugoi shorts because I didn’t want to get somebody else’s bike shorts all gnasty by trying on a few while covered in sweat and grime. And I figured that, as a person who bikes the distances I do, that I should get some better bike shorts. Everybody claims that bib shorts are better, so I figured I’d give them a try. I found some Sugoi RS bibs that fit the bill.

Now, bib shorts look silly. Let me explain, using bad Adobe Illustrator artwork, how little difference there is between ballerina and manly cyclist:

Ballerina vs. Manly Men

On the other hand, they really are more comfortable. They don’t roll down while you are wearing them. It’s just not a good idea to take your top off while wearing one.

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